How many times have you thought: “I’m just not a good leader”?

I hear this all the time from women CEOs who feel like they’re failing their teams, their clients, or even themselves. But it (usually) comes down to this one thing: you’re not a bad leader. You’re just leading in a way that doesn’t fit you.

Leadership isn’t one-size-fits-all. And trying to force yourself into someone else’s mold only leads to burnout, self-doubt, and frustration.

Why So Many Founders Feel Like “Bad Leaders”

Most of us have been handed the same leadership playbook:

• Hustle harder.
• Stay consistent at all costs.
• Keep everything under control.

But when you try to copy leadership styles that don’t honor your strengths, it feels misaligned. You get drained. You micromanage. You wonder if you’re cut out for this at all.

The truth? You’re not failing. You’re just using a leadership style that doesn’t work for you.

What “Leading the Wrong Way” Looks Like

You might be leading the wrong way if you…

• Force hustle culture habits that leave you exhausted.
• Copy someone else’s leadership style because it “worked for them.”
• Micromanage because delegation feels uncomfortable.
• Say yes when you want to say no, just to keep the peace.
• Ignore your intuition and override your nervous system cues.

Sound familiar? None of this makes you a bad leader! It just means you need a different approach.

My Perspective on Leadership

For me, leadership has always felt natural…but communication is where I’ve had to grow.

What’s helped most:

• Leading by example: showing up in the way I want others to.
• Assuming no question is dumb: making space for people to ask without fear.
• Not assuming people know what I know: slowing down to teach, not just delegate.
• Prioritizing clarity over perfection: clear expectations beat guessing games every time.

Leadership isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about being willing to grow, to listen, and to create an environment where others can thrive.

Finding Your Leadership Style

The most impactful leaders aren’t the ones who copy others, they’re the ones who know themselves.

Here are some tools and practices that can help:

• Self-awareness tools: Enneagram, Myers Briggs, Human Design, or leadership style assessments. These give you language for your strengths.
• Nervous system work: when you’re dysregulated, you lead from fight-or-flight. When you’re regulated, you lead with clarity.
• Delegation: lean into what you do best and empower others to take ownership of the rest.

Aligned leadership happens when you stop trying to fit into a box and start building from your strengths.

The Reframe

You’re not a bad leader. You’re a leader who hasn’t yet found the approach that honors who you are.

Leadership is a skill, not an innate trait. It’s something you can cultivate, refine, and practice…just like any other skill in your business.

So the next time you catch yourself thinking you’re failing as a leader, pause and reframe. You don’t need to lead harder. You need to lead differently.

Ready to step into leadership that feels aligned and sustainable? That’s exactly what I help founders do inside my Vision-to-Execution Accelerator